My horse is also getting old. She will be 30 this year. So I struggle with what is the right thing to do. Of course, we don’t ride long or hard, but sometimes I wonder if we should ride at all. I see others with older horses ride; and maybe even some more aggressively than we do, but I am sure no situation is the same. My vet told me it is good to ride your older horse once in awhile...it helps keeps their mind healthy and is good for them.
Because of that, some times I feel terribly guilty if I don’t ride; and at the same time I feel guilty if I do ride for fear of hurting her. Honestly, it is starting to put way too much sadness and apprehension on my life. I recently thought about this fact, and decided that maybe it is the Lord preparing me for the day I have to put her down...at 30, I know the hour is close. If there is no joy in riding, certainly it will be an easier thing to do. If it is more difficult to take care of her, (as it is in winter) then that should make it easier to put her down too. So far, I don’t think it is time...but time is working on me and readying me for that day.
As far as my age, every friend that I have that is my age and once rode, no longer rides. Even some quite a bit younger than me and more experienced than I am, and they have made the choice not to ride. That makes me wonder if I am missing something that I should know. Maybe their horses aren't as well mannered as mine. Maybe they don't make time. I don't know; but when I ask, the answer is, "I no longer ride." I use that to make myself feel better and to relieve some guilt. Neither do any of them have any advice as to when to put my horse down. The answer is always, "I have never had to do that." Or, "I don't know either." On that, I try to listen to my vet: "Your horse will let you know." Ugh. That doesn't really work for me, because I don't trust my judgment.
It’s mid-October now, so today I decided I needed to get one more ride in before the cold weather starts. I struggled. Saddling and bridling is always easy because she is such a well-behaved horse. And I have an Aussie saddle, so it is lighter and easier for me to lift and get the job done. I love that saddle. But I hate to admit it, getting on and off are the most difficult things of all for me. About that weight-gain...ugh! All my jeans are too tight, but I picked a pair today that I thought might give me a little stretch. Still they were a bit too tight. That’s my excuse anyway, and I couldn’t swing my leg over properly. My mare probably sensed my doubt and decided to take advantage; she moved...which she never does. I fell before I could get my right leg around her. My left foot wouldn’t come out of the stirrup, making it a bit more awkward than it needed to be. But the good horse that she is, she then just stood there and waited for me to get up. Realizing I hadn’t lifted my leg high enough, and knowing I needed to try a little harder to make it happen, getting on the second time was easier.
She didn’t really want to ride today. She always lets me know if she wants to go out of pasture, but today, she just knew we weren’t going to do that. She obliged every cue, but it wasn’t really what she wanted to do. When we went out to pasture, she still readily obliged, but about halfway down she started this coughing spell thing she does. Now honestly, I guess I should know, but I really don’t know if this is a gimmick to get me to turn around or if it is a real need. She does cough like this sometimes, when she runs over to meet me at the gate at feeding time. So I know it is at least in part real. I turned her around anyway, because I don’t really enjoy it at that point anymore than she does. We rode around the small pasture a bit and she did fine. So I took her back out to the big pasture and this time she rode ears forward and happy.
I guess overall it was a successful ride. At least I relieved my guilt. Dismounting was OK. Not perfect by any means. It’s just the way of it. I am old and stiff and fat. How do I know when it is time to stop riding? My husband told me it was time a long time ago. But as my vet instructed, I will try to listen to my mare. I don’t plan on letting my body stop me. We will see how that goes. Hopefully I won't miss any of my cues.
Until then, come on girl: Ears Forward. And thank you, sweet lady, for being patient with me and allowing us to grow old together.
No comments:
Post a Comment